It has been five months now since I found myself suddenly single after 36 years with the husband I loved more than words can say. Cancer got him. Third occurrence and this one meant business.
I've decided to chronicle my new life. This unwelcome new chapter in the untidy book of life. I'm actually okay, and I am even finding peace and joy in many of my days. And that's exactly what he would have wanted. What I believe he does want. But there are still those days....those stormy days when the Big Wave crashes and I cry and cry. Thankfully, they seem to be coming less often now. Well, until a holiday, or until I see his handwriting unexpectedly, or until I pass a wrist watch display in a store, as I did today, and remember how hooked he was on watches and how he could never pass a watch display without spending a long time looking them all over, especially if they were the $19.99 variety. So yeah, today I walked out of the store with tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat. But that's gonna happen.
But back to 'my new life'. I am learning to be a friend at the age of 60. Since he was my best friend and we did everything together, this is a challenge. Now I am trying to learn how to be a 'girlfriend' to girlfriends. I want to be a better friend than I have been in the past. I want to care more, reach out more, take more interest in the lives of those I have so casually called my friends.
I want to share my experiences, teachable moments, and helpful hints with anyone who would like to join me. I can think of three close friends of mine who have lost their husbands just in the last year. That's four of us in just one year. I know there are more of you out there.
Write comments. Share what you've learned and be a part of this. I look forward to it.
See ya next week.
